Did I hear you right Lord? You want me to quit my job, sell everything I've got and become a missionary in Asia? Give up all I've established here in Australia and move to a place I've never even been to before? Are you kidding me? There are already plenty of other people out there. Why do I need to go there too?
I have to say, the thought of giving up everything and uprooting myself to another country to become a missionary is quite scary. I've heard many testimonies from Christians that have given up so much to be in full time ministry and yet they feel so glad that they did. How did they gain the courage to submit to God's call?
Whenever I think about the possibility of God calling me to do this or even do something that isn't as drastic (e.g. serving in the church), fear and doubt tend to creep in. I react in a similar manner to how Moses did when God called him to lead the Israelites out Egypt.
Moses had many objections to completing the task that was given to him. Even though God kept reassuring Moses that He would always be with him, Moses still came up with every possible excuse not do what was asked of him [Exodus chapters 3 and 4].
I like Moses did, would probably find myself saying “Pardon your servant, Lord. Please send someone else.”
What's stopping me?
I discovered the problem I needed to address is that I'm afraid and I'm not trusting God with every aspect of my life. I'm afraid of the unknown (where is God taking me), afraid of leaving my comfort zone (bearing the cost) and afraid that I'm not good enough (or capable of doing what God asks me to).
But did God intend for me to live in fear of the plan he has for my life? Why am I letting fear stop me from fully experiencing the goodness of God? Would any good father (like God is) wish ill upon his children? So why let fear take a hold of my life instead of wholly trusting a loving, all-knowing God to direct my life?
Love conquered fear
As I was reading the book of John in the bible last week, I was reminded of how Jesus willingly submitted to His Father's will even to the point of death. As a Christian, I am called to become more like Christ. How will I ever submit to God's will no matter the cost just as Jesus did? Is this even possible?
With God, anything is possible [Matthew 19 verse 26]. In my own strength, I can do nothing. But through Christ who strengthens me, I can do all things [Philippians 4 verse 13]. God the loving Father, was always with Jesus and Jesus wholeheartedly trusted and obeyed his Father.
He relied on the Father to guide him and his Father was with him even through his suffering. In the end, Jesus came out victorious when He rose from the dead. Because He fulfilled the Father's will, we can now gain the forgiveness of sins and eternal life through Him.
God's will for us is good
I was greatly encouraged and strengthened in my faith as I reflected on the life of Jesus. I pray that I truly understand that God's will for me is good, pleasing and perfect [Romans 12 verse 2].
That He can be trusted in every area of my life. I realise that God will never ask us to do something without equipping us with the tools we need to complete those tasks. He equipped Moses, Jesus and many others.
I also need to remember that we have an enemy (Satan) of our souls that will try and use anything to devour us - even our fears. I will not give Satan the satisfaction of using my fear against me. Neither should I allow him to build up lies in my head that God cannot be trusted and doesn't want what's best for me. Satan is the liar and only seeks to kill, steal and destroy.
I'm finding rest in knowing that God causes everything to work together for the good of those who love Him and are called according to His purpose [Romans 8 verse 28]. As I seek His will in my life, I will be strong and courageous and I will not be afraid or discouraged. For the LORD, my God, is with me wherever I go.[Joshua 1 verse 9]
Kandima Awendila was born in Mozambique and lives and works as an IT Service Desk Engineer on the Gold Coast.
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