What do you do when, for years you have proclaimed in faith, believed for God to move and held onto hope and the promise of breakthrough…only to be left facing choices at a crossroads whilst still being in the valley?
For years I have watched people I know and love choose IVF to have babies and felt a resounding ‘no that’s not the Lord’s way, especially for us’ boom inside of me. I have judged these people and the apparent quickness of their decisions, without loving them as Jesus would have had me love. I have thought like so many spirit-filled Christians do, that blessing and breakthrough are supernatural gifts where all your prayers break through into the natural realm (everyday life) and that if you pray long enough these blessings will manifest.
I have honestly believed that God would give us a baby naturally and had faith that could move mountains. At one point I was so sure God could and would help us conceive naturally that I put all my maternity clothes into my normal wardrobe ready to wear for our imminent pregnancy.
Standing in the valley
This all being said we felt led to proceed with a surgery for me this past January and so were fully believing post-surgery, that now that I had had that procedure, we would fall pregnant naturally. So now standing the in valley, we had to make some decisions—draw a line in the sand. Many people face these decisions whether it be medical intervention, re-marrying, divorce or other areas that have shades of grey as to whether we ‘should’ and whether it is deviating from the faith path.
However, I know for me, I was surprised at the peace I had when I made the decision to pursue the next steps with doctors and medical intervention for us towards a baby—fully knowing that this will probably mean IVF. Previously I have had NO peace about it all so it just proves you have to be ready, that things change, that brokenness changes you and there has to be a change at some point. You can’t be in the desert forever. Peace has been my rule (Colossians chapter 3 verse 15) and for that I am glad.
Prophesies take time
My husband and I have had some BIG prophesies over our life. The biggest being that ‘we will pastor a church outside the city and run a supernatural creative school.’ We have had a ‘full quiver of children’ prophesied over us and Justin has had God speak years ago straight into his heart ‘You will have a son.’ Justin has even had HUGE prophesies over his art for God’s glory going forth and ‘ending up in houses of Governors and Generals, being like portals/ glimpses into the realm of God and selling for thousands and millions of dollars.’
What do we do with that?
So what do you do with prophesies like this? What do you do when the natural everyday life looks nothing like the spiritual promises over you? What do you do when you feel the call, so so strongly over your life? And yet you have NO clue how God will unravel it and make it happen and you have NO power to make any of it happen (because you are surrendered before God and because you can’t make the impossibilities possible.) What do you do with your brokenness, your questions, your hurts and your confusion?
I know what God would want us to do, and that is to run into his arms. No matter what comes our way he wants our hearts to run into his and shelter there, and for him to remain our First Love in our life. He is the only one who can break the ground open for us and he is also the only one who can heal our hearts.
Yes and Amen
So no matter what you’re going through, know that the promises of God are still yes and amen. Even when life doesn’t make sense and although life gets confusing sometimes and the journey takes twists and turns you never saw coming, know that He – GOD – Yahveh loves you, and his promise to be with us always (Emmanuel) is the most important one to keep in your heart.
He is a God of mercy and great great love and will walk with us through the valleys and hard times as well as on the mountain tops. He will bring us to a place of peace and rest, draw us unto himself with his everlasting love (Jeremiah chapter 31 verse 3) and will lead us in the path everlasting for His name’s sake (Psalm chapter 23 verse 3).
A hope and a future
It is also important to hold onto hope, for as in Jeremiah chapter 29 verse 11, God promises us a hope and a future. We are currently looking at a potential ministry property for our God-dreams to become a reality.
Sometimes you just need to put one foot in front of the other and trust God to be your courage as you step out; trust that He will restore and rebuild even to the point of joy and dancing once again (Jeremiah chapter 31 verse 4). His word is still his word and he cannot lie (Numbers chapter 23 verse 19).
So I choose to trust him even with the mess of my questions and situations, and believe that somehow his Word will still come to pass for our lives.
Liana is a creative soul living on the South Coast of Adelaide working as a Personal Assistant and Nanny, using her spare time to sit in God’s presence, write songs, psalm and intercede for things on Gods heart.