What does it mean to be single as a relationship status?
The world urges us to find a soulmate, get married someday, have kids and etcetera. For many parents, when their child marries someone, it is defined as one of the important pillars of success.
The world also tells us we should not be content with our single status. So, in response to this, we embark on the relentless search of finding someone to complete us.
In the midst of pursuing, we have a tendency to lean towards outward appearances as the best choice rather than focusing on the heart of the person. People often fall in love right away when the other person is handsome or beautiful.
Once we find a lifelong partner, we decide what moves to make to be in a close relationship with that person, when to engage with her or him, when to get married and then how to make a soulmate happy all day long. We find that happiness as our happiness.
My story
When I was in high school, many old friends of mine called me ‘pimp’ because I used to hang out with girls all the time. So, I guessed that word was cool and liked that nickname, so I went along with it – my high school nickname was ‘pimp.’
However, when I searched that word up in a dictionary, I discovered pimp was a man who gains money for having sex. I was disgusted at being called a pimp as this was the last thing I wanted to represent me.
I guess I wanted someone to recognise me as a great man to be a lifelong partner with.
Good comment
When I was going through Saddleback Church’s sermons, I came across a sermon called ‘Heroic Singleness’ by guest speaker Jonathan Pokluda. In his sermon, he declared that single people could be considered as heroes of God as singleness can be our teacher of supremacy and sufficiency in Jesus.
One of his quotes is “single people are the picture in the church. They set the pace of what full devotion to Jesus looks like” (Heroic Singleness, Jonathan Pokluda).
This sermon has inspired me so much.
Theological definition
According to the Bible, there is nothing about Jesus Christ, the Son of God, and Apostle Paul, and several writers of the Scripture pursuing a lifelong partner to be with. Yes, they had partners but in a different context.
Throughout the gospels, we find Jesus Christ having a partner in God as Jesus Christ was God in the human form. Throughout the New Testament letters, we read Apostle Paul and other writers found their partners in people. For example, Paul partnered with Timothy.
These are because they all focused on the mission of God, which was to unite everything back to God (2 Corinthians chapter 5, verses 11-21), and they did not have time for anything else.
However, the mission of God cannot be done alone; people have to partner with each other (Ephesians chapter 4, verses 9-16). Therefore, it is alright to have a girlfriend/boyfriend. God gives us the freedom to choose whether to remain single or be in a relationship with someone.
Recently, Windsor Park Baptist Church had a guest speaker and his sermon was about the calling of God. In the sermon, he proclaimed that we have to find a lifelong partner who is willing to fight for our call in the aspect of the mission of God.
I desire to find a girlfriend who is willing to support me in becoming a Christian writer and who will build the kingdom of God with me all the time. However, I consider a gift of singleness as a blessing too because pleasing God through faith in Jesus Christ is my ultimate aim (see Hebrews chapter 11, verse 6).
God uses each one of us for His mission and since believers in Christ share the same Spirit of God, we have a vital role to play. A church is a place where believers in Christ are gathered together to worship God.
However, it also can be called the bride of Christ. Although God allows everyone to find a lifelong partner, in order to build each other up, let God be a true husband and lifelong partner of your life.
Seek the Kingdom of God above all else, and live righteously, and he will give you everything you need (Matthew chapter 6, verse 33).