Trying to think of a way to start this article was a little bit hard, because there’s not really a gentle way to drive into such a deep subject. However, I want to talk about fear and pain.
Recently I had to take my beautiful dog to the vet, and due to all types of sickness that had come with old age, we had to put him to sleep.
This was a first for me. To be honest, I haven’t experienced a lot of loss in my life, I had a few people pass away when I was a kid, but for the most part I was too young to fully understand what was happening.
When I thought about my dog passing, I knew I would be sad, and I know I would miss him deeply, but something I didn’t expect was the element of fear that came with it.
Relationships are worth it
As I reflected on what had happened, I realised something, when you experience loss or even hurt of any kind, it can be tempting to become afraid.
Afraid of being hurt again, of losing someone else, of getting too close to people.
At some point, all of us have experienced hurt in one way or another. Whether it’s because you had a falling out with a good friend, or grew up in a broken home, maybe you lost someone or maybe you had your heart broken. Whatever it was, when things like that happen, it can seem easier to step back from people than it is to step deeper into relationships with them, but that’s why I wanted to write this article.
Relationships will probably come with an element of pain, of struggle, and of stretching. They require sacrifice, time, and a willingness to lay down ourselves for the sake of those we love. It definitely comes with a cost.
Although, what I realised was, I think that living without people, without deep connection and without love, is a much higher cost to pay.
Embracing the struggle
I think for me, this whole situation has been a bit of a wakeup call. I realised that love is hard sometimes, and relationships are hard sometimes, but I want to learn to be okay with that.
I want to learn to let go of those expectations that life will always be perfect and accept the hard times and challenges that come with it. I don’t want to miss the beauty of relationship and love, because of the fear of pain.
I think the solution isn’t to shy away from pain, but instead to embrace it. To embrace the stretching that life holds and to allow it make help you to grow. I don’t want to live life in fear of what could happen, but instead I want to learn to take everything that happens in my stride and come out of it a better than when I went in.
We can learn to accept what life is and enjoy the wonderfulness that comes from when we do. It’ll be worth it, because at the end of our lives, I think we will regret the things we hid from more than we would regret any pain that we walked through to gain them.