I've just spent the last fortnight in Airlie Beach in the Whitsunday region, Northern Queensland. Perhaps one of the most beautiful places I have ever been; strikingly similar to the beaches of Corinth in Greece, it's a place to squander time and money without a care.
The air, thick with humidity presses in on you, but you get used to it. The same way you get used to looking out over the most beautiful crystal blue ocean, and not swimming in it for the infestation of lethal box jellyfish. I choose the lagoon, thank you very much.
Don't get me wrong; I'm not down on Airlie. In fact, it's one of my favourite places in Australia. Flat roads and safe neighbourhoods, perfect for late night long-board trips. Restaurants with great coffee and sweet atmosphere open all hours for early morning alone time. Stunning views and a gorgeous lagoon to chill out in. The perfect place for a day cruise around some of the most beautiful beaches and islands in the world. And backpackers galore, if you ever want to have a conversation about what else is out there.
Schoolies
This isn't a publicity stint for the Whitsundays, I promise. Actually, the interesting thing about my stay over the last few days was the fact that it's that time of year again; exams are done and school is over for an entire grade of kids across the country. So as 50,000 kids collectively peace out of school and make their P-plated way the nearest coastline, police, SES and other first response services brace themselves for a week of candy-coloured vomit and phone calls to the apartments of hyper emotional, completely intoxicated 17 year olds.
Thousands of parents fret over the well-being of their young adults who are not really very adult at all. They make anxious phone calls to groggy voices at sunrise the next morning, believing every word their precious darling manages to string into a sentence about how quiet and lame their night was. I don't mean to be so cynical. I'm absolutely positive that there are thousands who break the mould; in fact, I met some of them. I spoke to many kids who had no interest in drinking or partying hard all week long, and were more interested in island cruises, reef trips and donning a wetsuit so they could brave the 'irukandji' waters of death.
My task in Airlie Beach was to help YWAM [Youth With A Mission] Whitsunday with their Chai Tent Ministry over the course of Schoolies week. An awesome initiative, and an idea replicated across the country. A place for kids to chill out for as long as they want in a totally safe environment and drink buckets of free, quality, non-alcoholic, chai tea. It was a rewarding experience to spend time with kids bubbling with excitement over their newfound freedom, so fresh it doesn't even seem real yet. It was interesting to hear why people had decided to come to Airlie rather than the (in)famous Gold Coast for their week of shenanigans. The answer was the same across the board... It was safer.
Parents all over the state were sending their kids to Airlie, convinced that it was the wisest decision for them to make and that their child would be safer. I would only agree with the latter of these. The kids are safer, but Surfers Paradise is a low bar to set, in terms of wisdom and safety. There's very little that could happen at Airlie that wasn't already being done on an hourly basis on the Gold Coast. However on one of my many longboard adventures I spotted many young couples experiencing 'love' for the first time under trees, on the beach and behind tents. I found empty bottles of alcohol in every bathroom I visited, and spotted seedy young men retching into waste bins. It was a little bit chaotic.
I'm giving you the worst of the worst here, but it's still the truth. There were clusters of people who preferred the chai tent over the dance floor, and paddle boarding over boozy nights. but I certainly wouldn't walk around alone at night during the graduation escapades, much less allow my kid to experience a week of this supervised insanity.
The pursuit of value
All of these observations lead me to one subject; value. All I can see here are 3000+ seventeen year old kids searching for their value in the wrong place. Multitudes of people having sex with the first boy/girl that will pay them attention, and hundreds of girls wearing less clothing than what my underwear covers, in public. Consuming bottle after bottle, can after can of whatever sugary, colourful, alcoholic beverage they manage to smuggle past security, grinding up against the closest attractive person for just a hint of approval, cascades of red-frog coloured vomit with a mixture of tears, cheering and horror coming from surrounding friends.
All of these images produce one very clear message that I have serious concern about. Where are these kids getting their value? Where are they getting their self worth? Why don't they understand that they are important and valuable outside of what they can give or do for anyone else?
During one of my volunteer shifts, I sat with a girl and spoke with her for a few hours. Her best friend left her outside the chai tent so she could find a place to sleep with the boy she met on the dance floor an hour earlier. The friend, who we can call Danni, sat and shared with me her concern for the welfare of her friend. I also expressed concern and asked if it was a regular occurrence. "Oh yeah," said Danni, "All of my friends do it. They just kinda fall into bed with whoever sounds good at the time. They give me (s...t) because I don't really... pick up many guys."
I scrambled to pick my jaw up off the floor before responding. I come from a world where young women are reprimanded and condemned for engaging in sexual relations, even insofar as a kiss with the opposite gender, and here this girl was being ridiculed because she had avoided such liberal activities. Once I had gathered myself I asked her if she felt like she was being condemned or cast out because of her abstinence, and she quickly assured me that she felt like a 'total loser' and that she was "unattractive and unlovable" because no guy had asked her to share his bed for an evening.
My heart broke for her
A beautiful young woman, who had achieved good grades and had a killer sense of humour; dressed to the trend and was a talented gymnast, felt that she had no worth because she hadn't had sex. I couldn't deal with it. I can't deal with it. What sort of place are we living in that the value of a young girl (or boy) is diminished simply because they won't take every opportunity to jump into bed with someone.
I'm not even putting in a plug for chastity belts here; I'm really just talking about the image and standard we set for young people today. What do we expect of them? How can we change it? What can we do to empower young people, and give them the hope that they are valuable and worthy of love, whether they have sex or not?
I don't have a practical solution the world will listen to. I just have a seething anger and a heart for young people across this country (and others). I urge you, if you have made it to the end of this very long post, to do your best to cultivate a society where young adults are not chastised for their unwillingness to engage in such frivolity (drugs, sex, alcohol, etc,). Rather encourage them to be who they are, and speak value into their lives. Only then will we begin to see solutions to the annual schoolies chaos.
Dakota Neibling is a 19 year old missionary kid who grew up in the suburbs of Brisbane, Australia. She endeavours to love the Lord and love people. Currently a full time volunteer at Youth With a Mission, she has a heart for politics, international relations and social change.
Dakota Neibling's previous articles may be viewed at http://www.pressserviceinternational.org/dakota-neibling.html