Susan Patton who is not unknown to my columns for good old common sense, has once again given young women good sound motherly advice so as to avoid sexual assault. And the do-gooders are up in arms.
And what are the do-gooders complaints: Women should be allowed to get as 'drunk as a skunk', get 'stoned', 'give the come-on signal', 'play the field', 'open or close their legs whenever' – to this motley crew, it's the boys who have total responsibility. Full stop!
Listen to what Susan Patton actually said:
"We're now talking about or identifying as rape what really is a clumsy hook-up melodrama or a fumbled attempt at a kiss or a caress. In many cases this is what it is"
and again
"It makes one wonder, why don't you [rape victims] get up and leave? Why, as a woman, do you not tell a man who is making advances you're not comfortable with, 'Stop. Leave'."
and again
"women should stay 'sober enough' to get out of dangerous situations. We could teach burglars not to steal, but better advice: Lock your door."
and again
"Any young man on any college campus who is accused of having sexually assaulted a woman starts from the position of being guilty until they can prove their own innocence,"
My two previous articles on Susan Patton's sensible and down to earth comments for young women are:
"Even common sense is getting a bad rap in the realm of women advising women in finding a husband"
and, "The happiest husbands"
My article on Susan Patton's 'common sense' was published on 27 April 2013 and the article on 'the happiest husbands' on the 29 October 2014.
First point
Susan Patton is a Princeton graduate and mother of two Ivy League sons, and made the point as noted in my first article, that a statistical analysis that young women in Princeton in their under-graduate years have a plethora of men surrounding them, and such a statistical opportunity in their favour in finding a husband will simply not present itself in the future. Makes sense to me. Both Susan Patton and I can count and we're not even mathematicians.
And our own Miranda Divine says a whole lot more besides in this common sense vein. It's not rocket science.
The statistical analysis Susan Patton announces is indisputable. The same indisputable statistical analysis can be drawn from Christian Church and Mission associated youth groups, seminaries, bible colleges and such like, where young Christian men and women find their partners for life. Ding dong!
Second point
My second article, Susan Patton noted: ... the pendulum has swung so far towards women's needs that the husbands (partners) have been left to drift and such a man will respond to some 'purring' pointed in his direction.
"The emphasis on women's needs are everywhere – advertising, merchandise, cosmetics, cars, clothing or lack of it, fulfillment, career, education, sexual appetite, holidays, sun tans, well-being, psychology, political correctness, best seats, right of way (supermarkets, lining up, banking, anything really).
"It's time the pendulum was stopped and given a nudge in the other direction". She has some very practical suggestions: "Welcome your husband home with a smile asking him not to fix something, but to genuinely express your appreciation (that he comes home at all – as it were)."
Now this !
O goodness me ... hold onto your hat, another dose of common sense from Susan Patton.
Girls, wake up! Don't put yourself in stupid situations, how about a bit of sensible positioning! You have options - getting under the weather (drunk) or stoned (drugs) is entirely in your ball court. It's your responsibility to look after yourselves.
Is this Bible 101 .... in a secular format!
Dr Mark Tronson is a Baptist minister (retired) who served as the Australian cricket team chaplain for 17 years (2000 ret) and established Life After Cricket in 2001. He was recognised by the Olympic Ministry Medal in 2009 presented by Carl Lewis Olympian of the Century. He mentors young writers and has written 24 books, and enjoys writing. He is married to Delma, with four adult children and grand-children.
Mark Tronson's archive of articles can be viewed at http://www.pressserviceinternational.org/mark-tronson.html