Lately I received a picture on Instagram with few empty jars with labels, the statement on the top said “Jars of your fears”, and posed this question: Mark the jar with how much you feel scared of each label mentioned at the jar? The options included: small spaces, heights, spiders, darkness, public speaking, clowns, snakes, losing a loved one, water and fire.
Guess what! Most people answer was: the scariest thing for them was losing someone they loved. Which explains the fact we humans are so much attached emotionally to people around us, we are very sensitive to lose the closely related individuals in our lives.
Think for a minute what do you care most in your life? Answer will be loved ones around us. So commonly people put their relationships high on the list. The simple equation for life is: even if you have health issues, but someone is there to take care of you or if you have loving relationships, you can appreciate life.
Famous quote:“Money can’t buy happiness” . In other words, you can make a lot of money, but if your relationships are shattered or low, your life will be empty. A poor man with a loving family and good friends is far richer than a rich man who is poor relationship. Give time and importance to your loved ones.
What the Bible says
According to Biblical context, healthy relationships are the most important thing in life. In Matthew Chapter 22, verses 36-40, says, “a Jewish religious expert asks Jesus, “Teacher, which is the great commandment in the Law?” Jesus replied Jesus replied: ‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.’ This is the first and greatest commandment. And the second is like it: ‘Love your neighbour as yourself.’ All the Law and the Prophets hang on these two commandments.’”
Unconditional love
God loves us unconditionally, so have a loving relationship with Him; but loving relationships with others is second. The Bible is all about these two important relationships. Even Bible preaches about unconditional love, sacrifice; it’s sad that many people around us have hurting or broken relationships.
Human behaviour
If we study human behaviour from past decade, we observe Christian homes have been shattered by divorce, and we see families less likely to have tolerant behaviour towards each other. Some people stay in marriage just because they have kids, yet they are unhappy with each other. Their homes are quite like battle grounds, where no one wants to talk or interact. We on the whole have become less assertive, and more defensive. Church members hop from church to church just because they have odd terms or misunderstandings with any specific family coming to the same church. It is such a hurtful behaviour in the recent history of Christian society. The Bible states and we should memorise such verses, like Ephesians Chapter 4, verse 2, which says “with all humility and gentleness, with patience, bearing with one another in love.”
Likewise, 1st Peter Chapter 3, verse 8-11 says, “Finally, all of you, have unity of mind, sympathy, brotherly love, a tender heart, and a humble mind. Do not repay evil for evil or reviling for reviling, but on the contrary, bless, for to this you were called, that you may obtain a blessing. For ‘Whoever desires to love life and see good days, let him keep his tongue from evil and his lips from speaking deceit; let him turn away from evil and do good; let him seek peace and pursue it.’”
Healthy relationships
If we constantly practice these talents, it is said that you’ll have healthy relationships. But on the other hand, you may think sometimes it’s too difficult to get along even if you try very hard. True. As healthy relationships require a two-way street, there is give and take. It’s virtually impossible to have a good relationship with some people! Paul acknowledged this when he wrote in Romans Chapter 12, verse 18, which says,“If possible, so far as it depends on you, be at peace with all men.”
Sometimes, no matter what you do, some people are hard to get along with.
But often if you treat a difficult person with love God will definitely change his mind and improve your relationship with him/her. The reason you should do this is because God has kindly chosen and loved you. Saint Paul is basically saying that God’s gracious, loving treatment of us is the basis for our treatment of others.
Jennifer Javed Khan is a PSI young writer from Pakistan.