A recent article in News.com spells out the science of having someone fall in love with you. The five points are clarifying and kind of manipulative as they are given like a formula – do these and he or she will be putty in your dreams.
I realise many young people and bit older individuals are looking for ways to attract someone they themselves are interested in. In this sense, these five listed are fair and square good starting points. Here they are – I recommend go to the article itself to read the science behind each.
Keep eye contact
Be a good listener
Validation
Smiling
Touching
In business sales, keeping eye contact is critical. Care professionals know how important listening is. Everyone likes being validated. A lovely smile is attractive regardless.
Touching can be tricky. But in developing relationships, touching an arm is certainly right up there. If you watch movie romances, for men it is moving a lock of her hair from her face, for women it is placing their arm inside his arm. For her, allowing the touch of her hair is an act of genuine intimacy. For him, the woman voluntarily placing her arm inside his is an act of his strong protection.
These things are real. These things play important parts in ascertaining how a relationship fare, they are part and parcel of testing the waters. Whether or not they together play a part in the science of having someone fall in with with you is .....
Jesus' falling in love with you and me
It is worth studying the New Testament as to how Jesus' relationship with women as fully man and fully God – the deity – developed. There are numerous passages, and each see this Jesus handle each situation in a different light.
Here are a few as an example
Peter's Mother in Law - Peter was obviously married, his wife was on the scene and involved with the tasks of sustaining a home living environment and it was her mother who became seriously ill. Somewhere along the line she would have alerted Peter, then he Jesus. In this instance, Jesus engaged in a healing. Peter's wife and other relatives would have been close bye and had Jesus said anything untoward, it would have been recorded. In other words, it was a relationship of family friends.
The woman at the well – he is another case where Jesus spoke with a woman who for all intents and purposes should have been avoided in terms of a male Jew – indeed having any kind of conversation. We know from the end of the story - this woman was not illiterate or ill informed, she discussed with Jesus relevant religious issues with some prominence as she felt confident as a widow to move in with someone and able to forward on Jesus' revelations.
Then there was Mary who wiped Jesus' feet with her long beautiful scented hair and he responded with a teaching as to his mission. His focus was squarely centred on the coming Kingdom and this gave him an ideal situation in which to press home his central purpose.
In each and every situation, even when on the cross with his mother's old age upon his mind, the focus of his attention proved explicit and delineated.
With men
How did Jesus then communicate with men. Again here are some examples -
Men at work – regardless of any more modern interpretations of who 'brings home the bacon' for the most part the men were engaged in such family provisions. Jesus met professionals in the fishing industry. He met men who were engaged in finance. He met men involved with the military. It was man to man.
Religious men – Jesus constantly met with religious men, some with trickery attempting to test him out, he met a young man struggling with integrity, he met men who were lame and ill in religious environs. In each case he responded in such a way as the enquirers were left with questions of their own.
Those close to him – whatever else we can say, those men of whom he was closest, as it says in the Scripture, turned the world upside down. They became real men, Kingdom men.
The Cross and Resurrection
What all this says is that Jesus' passion for all of his children, is such that he was willing and fulfilled the ultimate sacrifice of death on the Cross of Calvary as a means whereby Salvation might be offered to each and every person.
The resurrection is, if you like, the hero figure of this story, Jesus being raised to life the third day – this is the celestial celebration of Salvation. As the Apostle Paul says, 'O death where is your sting?'
This is the joy message of being a follower of Jesus. It has the hallmarks of assurance, confidence, security ... this is the 'wondrous eternal story' !
Dr Mark Tronson is a Baptist minister (retired) who served as the Australian cricket team chaplain for 17 years (2000 ret) and established Life After Cricket in 2001. He was recognised by the Olympic Ministry Medal in 2009 presented by Carl Lewis Olympian of the Century. He mentors young writers and has written 24 books, and enjoys writing. He is married to Delma, with four adult children and grand-children.
Mark Tronson's archive of articles can be viewed at http://www.pressserviceinternational.org/mark-tronson.html