Pain is something which is a constant part of my life, no matter how hard I try to push it aside, ignore it, or not think about it, the heartache remains.
The more I try to push the pain away, hide my emotions, the aching just seems to get worse, coming back into focus again and again.
When it comes to dealing with the pain, I try to deal with the problem but avoid dealing with the emotional side of it, the crying part, as it is something I do not want or like to do.
A boiling pot
After a while I feel overwhelmed by it all and just like a pot of water boiling on the stove, I reach the point where the lid on the pot comes off allowing the water to flow over the sides.
I mean the sadness gets to the point it affects my day-to-day life, which ends up with me falling apart, crying the tears, I tried so desperately to hide away.
I know it is something I need to learn to deal with at the start, not allowing my emotions to build up to the point they overflow, which has been something I have not been able to do on my own.
Thankfully, I know this is not something I have to deal with on my own, I know God is with me through the most painful parts of my journey with Him and my day-to-day life.
The broken hearted
The reason I know and hold on to this hope is because of a verse I have heard many times during the years of going to church, learning about God and how He loves me through reading the books of the Bible.
The verse I am referring to comes from the book of Psalms chapter 34 verse 18 which in the New King James Version of the Bible it reads, “The Lord is close to broken hearted, and saves such as have a contrite spirit.”
In this passage the word “contrite” is defined as meaning, ‘caused by or showing sincere remorse, filled with a sense of guilt and the desire for atonement; penitent.’
I find hope in this verse because of two reasons, the first is because it constantly feels like my heart is broken and no matter how many times I try to put it back together by myself, my heart just falls apart again but I know if I put my heart into the hands of God, He will restore my heart to the way He intended it to be, whole in Him.
The second reason why I find hope in this verse is because I know the Lord is close to me during these times, knowing He will not leave me in my most painful places during my life to which I am forever grateful.
There is something which would be worthwhile in my opinion, despite the tears and emotions which would follow, would be to give my broken heart to the Lord and along with my heart giving Him full control over my life, to me, a huge relief off my shoulders.
What a great relief it would be!!
Natasha Rider of Gladstone Qld, is a young woman who has recently comes back to faith , looking for a good job and is passionate about writing.