“I have had enough Lord,” he said, “Take my life, I am no better than my ancestors.” 1Kings 19:4. These were the words of Elijah right after he had performed one of the greatest miracles in the Bible. He was able to call down fire from heaven and prove to other false prophets that God was the one and only true God. But no good deed goes unpunished. Jezebel heard that Elijah had not only embarrassed her prophets but also had them killed. She vowed that she would ensure that Elijah’s life was cut off, just like he did the false prophets. God had just shown up for Elijah in front of all these people and now with this new threat he ran because he feared losing his life. He would rather God take his life that Queen Jezebel. Elijah was frustrated, exhausted and alone. I would think after a victorious display of God’s power that the enemy would take a break.
At times we have these ‘mountain top’ experiences with God and right after we fall into a pit of depression. When all the excitement goes away, we tend to let our guard down and that’s when the enemy strikes. Then we forget. We forget what God had just done and what he is capable of doing. We get intimidated by the empty threats of others. In psalm 118:6 it says, “The Lord is with me; I will not be afraid. What can mere mortals do to me?” Because the truth is, what can ‘mere mortals’ really do to us? God is omnipotent and omniscient, so we should have nothing to worry about as his children. But at times we still feel alone.
This world has a way of isolating those who stand for what is right. As Christians, it makes life a little bit harder especially if we don’t have others like us to give support. Elijah felt alone. He wasn’t alone, but in that moment he felt alone. This is how I often feel when life gets complicated. The friends and family support that was there before seems to no longer be available. Every time you pick up the phone to make a call, it goes straight to voicemail. Then what should we do? We run and hide and at times even hope for death. We hope for a way out of this world because the journey seems to hard to bear.
Elijah was honest with God about how he felt, and God was able to meet his need. God fed him, guided him to a safe place and then showed him his support system. God can work with our honesty and with our brokenness. He can restore us to a place where we can feel whole again. Elijah was restored from a place where he was able to mentor his successor and go on to anoint kings. He went from wanting to die, to giving life to others. Even though we may feel alone in the world, especially after being in Covid isolation, we can be reminded from this story that we are not alone. Don’t be afraid to let God into your dark areas and see what he does with it.