In my last article I decided to get vulnerable. I opened up about lots of things that have happened in my life. I hope those that read were challenged, in whatever way you felt God challenging you.
With that said, the last 3 months have been harder than any other time in my life. As the last 3 months played out, it has gotten more difficult with every passing day. Today seems to be more difficult than yesterday. One of the reasons is because I don’t have answers. And the question at hand, although I found an answer, lead me to more questions.
As my thoughts hit the page and you read my contemplations, I welcome you into the depths of my mind. Which I will try and keep sensible because as everyone should know, thoughts don’t always make sense. Welcome to my musings.
Is God self-centred?
As soon as I heard this question my immediate reaction was “no”. But I had to answer why I believed that God isn’t self-centred. We gather in churches all over the world to worship God. Then God commands us to not be self-centred but Christ centred. But why does God command this? If God is love, then why does He want Himself to be the centre of all things?
For many people, the idea that we should worship a God who doesn’t stop all the hurting and terrible things in the world doesn’t make much sense. I mean, if God hasn’t helped us, then why would we want to worship Him? Is God so unsure of Himself that He needs our worship?
Where is our focus?
All throughout Scripture we see Jesus pointing towards something different than what the people around Him were usually observing. The chances of a disciple getting a question correct or a group of people knowing exactly what Jesus was talking about was minimal at best. The focus of the world was much different than the focus of Jesus. He seemed to see past this world, the material stuff and the things that people prioritized.
Which is greater?
Jesus saw and tried to explain things that were of greater value. He understood better than anyone the things that were unseen. A realm in which His Father, the God of all, resides. And not just resides, but is actively effecting the “seen” world in which people live. He seemed to be trying to show that this Kingdom doesn’t just sit in the unseen realm, but can break into the material world.
Listen to Jesus in Matthew chapter 16 verse 23 as He rebukes Peter, “For you are not setting your mind on the things of God, but on the things of man.”
Wrestling
And this is where I have been wrestling with God: To what extent does God’s Kingdom effect our world? God should be self-centred because He is good and loving. He doesn’t just sit back and watch the world, but is a part of it. That prayer works because God listens.
Questions: Answered and Unanswered
I’m still wrestling with God. Not that He deserves our worship. God already has all the glory and fame. We are just ascribing that glory to the One that has it. We are recognizing it and our worship declares to the world that He deserves it. Not for what He does but because of who He is. My wrestling comes from my belief in God’s character. Is God’s Kingdom coming into the world? Do our prayers matter or is “God’s will” going to happen either way? Will God intervene?
Do we worship a self-centred God? Well, where else should he attribute his affections? Should the God who created everything place the clay above the potter? An answer, that has led to more questions created a wrestling Christian.
Challenge: Don’t be afraid to wrestle with God. All the while, giving Him the praise he deserves.
Jason LaLone was on staff at YWAM Brisbane and is currently in America working with Truro Anglican Church located in Fairfax, Virginia. He is passionate about discipleship, taking Jesus’ command to make disciples a practical reality that he can live on a daily basis. He loves lasagna, cats and used to dislike Monday's, making him most like Garfield.
Jason LaLone’s previous articles might be viewed at: http://www.pressserviceinternational.org/Jason-LaLone.html