During the summer break, we did some spring cleaning at home. We gave away books, puzzles, tricycles, clothes and lots of other things as well as threw out broken toys.
Many of these have been left in a corner hidden in boxes and shelves, collecting dust ever since they were last used. There were even more than three hundred diapers which have been sitting around untouched for more than 2 years alongside a baby cot although my youngest is already a primary school student.
Mistaken
When it was the first day of the new year, my eldest was looking for his 2022 school calendar to replace the old 2021 calendar. To our horror though, a stack of precious photos and cards had been mistakenly thrown away because of some miscommunication between my husband and I as we were clearing the stuff.
Regret and disappointment hit hard as we realised some of our most precious photos were somewhere in the trash that had already been collected, gone for good. There was nothing we could do about it.
My 8 year old broke into tears and wailed uncontrollably, extremely upset by the ordeal; “You threw away my memories! Now I won’t be able to remember my friends from my old school without my school photos!”
What surprised me from his outburst was how much his memories were completely reliant on physical materials. He was dependent on the photos to keep his memory of his schooling days intact.
Bidding the past adieu
We sat down and together grieved the loss of our special belongings. Next, we talked about how these experiences we have had do not disappear just because we do not have a photo of it with it. That it is fine to not have a physical visual memory of it but to cherish the experiences we have and to learn from what it has taught us.
We learned how to let go and say goodbye to things in the past. Though they were good days, that greater days are yet to come. That it is okay to bid things in the past away since it makes way for the new.
As the Lord says in Isaiah chapter 43, verses 18 to 19, “Do not cling to events of the past or dwell on what happened long ago. Watch for the new thing I am going to do. It is happening already—you can see it now!”
Forward focused
Imagine running a race but continuously turning our head to the back for long periods of time. We’ll easily swerve out of our lane each time we turn our head backward. With each turn our speed drops as we slow down to look back.
However, when we keep our gaze steadfast in front, we propel forward on track without losing momentum. We are better prepared for any obstacles that come our way and are less likely to miss a step.
Having said that, all experienced drivers know that when we are driving it is not only important to look forward but to also constantly check our mirrors. Mirrors reflect the things in the back and sides that we need to be aware of.
Things in the past are part of us and undeniably have an impact in our lives. The key to this is that we briefly check but not dwell on what’s behind us. When we include what’s behind us but spend more time on what’s ahead of us, we keep our focus on what’s to come and not what have already came.
My past is my past
While we reminisce memories of the past, whether sweet or bitter, these memories do not determine our future. Things can be sweeter than our sweetest memory. Our bitter memories are already behind us and should not have a hold on our present.
I’m not exactly throwing my memories away, but instead I’m being clear of what it is exactly – it is my past, it is not my present; it is my past, it is not my future.
As the song ‘New Thing' by Hillsong Young & Free goes,
‘We’re ready for what’s yet to come
Ready for what You’ve got next
We’re ready for the past to pass
We’re running where the future is'