What is thirty? Is it an age where society expects us to have everything categorically in order? Surely there must be more to this number than naturally proceeding 29 and preceding 31.
Turning 30 left me in anticipation of a midlife crisis and feeling wildly unprepared for the “adult life” society expected me to have. Growing up, I romanticised this milestone, and lived in anticipation of a sense of accomplishment and “maturity” defined by society and modern culture. Shockingly, there was no revelatory sense of adulthood that came at the stroke of midnight.
Stop and listen.
Feeling the rushing wind of society often leaves us sailing against the tides of our calling. The pressure of trying to match the nature of where someone else is in life leaves us beyond our means and losing sight of our own destination.
When we lose sight of our calling, someone else’s destination may seem like a better course and we become hasty, irrational and impulsive.
“My dear brothers and sisters, understand this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to anger,” (James chapter 1, verse 19).
This scripture in James reminded me of the importance of listening, but also understanding. Sometimes, understanding can be difficult. It’s not a passive action that can be done whilst anxious and under societal duress.
Gaining understanding requires awareness and comprehension. Being slow to speak and becoming angry, or impulse-driven, sometimes requires we stop to actively listen. If we don’t stop for a moment, stop rushing and mindlessly speaking, we can miss the whisper of the Creator calling us back on course, the very wind we’ve been refusing to acknowledge.
Adjust your course.
Thirty isn’t what I thought it would be. I’m not where I thought I would be at thirty. What used to be a milestone has left me needing to readjust as I barrelled into it.
Adjusting courses is terrifying, whether we’re struggling to change trajectory or scared of the possible outcomes. What will people think when you turn around to adjust your sails? Will they think you’ve failed or fleeing?
“It is better to take refuge in the LORD than to trust in man.” (Psalm chapter 118, verse 8)
Thankfully, our eternal refuge isn’t found in the opinions of people. Our hope is in our Creator, who knows us better than any other human. When we adjust our course, the opinions of people bear no comparison against God’s thoughts towards us and the course we charter.
Set sail.
With your course revaluate, you cannot stay paused forever. It’s time to set sail. Seeing (or not seeing) the route you are called to cannot compare to the journey itself. Thirty isn’t what I imagined, but perhaps that’s the point. MY daydreams cannot stand next to the will of the One who created me.
“So do not throw away your confidence; it will be richly rewarded. You need to persevere so that when you have done the will of God, you will receive what he has promised.” (Hebrews chapter 10, verses 35 and 36)
Whilst we were never promised the still oceans, we know that our confidence lies in the One who beckons us to step out in faith. We are called not to follow the ways of our fellow man, riddled with uncertainty. Our surety lies in the most resolute and indelible One who called us out to begin with.
Thirty may be just another number. Thirty may look like the pressure to have your life’s affairs in order. Thirty may be the fear of falling short of “adult expectations”. Thirty is not the answer to the meaning of life.
Thirty is the opportunity to sail towards the call of our Creator, no matter what the world thinks.