I have a “World’s Best Mother” ornament sitting on my study shelf.
It was a Mother’s Day gift from my then primary aged children presented along with home-made cards, a green stem vase and breakfast in bed. What a treasured memory.
Nowadays, I am appreciated in a less heroic, but still thoughtful way!
Good mothers aid emotional health
Developmentally children go through many stages on the way to adulthood. Healthy attachment to a mother (mother figure/care giver) is foundational to ongoing secure self-worth.
Recently I came across this valuable quote “The Parent-Child connection is the most powerful mental health intervention known to man-kind.”
Best-selling American Christian Author, Catherine Marshall, knew the power of a capable mother in her life. In her book “Dearest Mother, Dearest Friend,” she honours and chronicles the beautiful relationship she shared with her mum. A collection of journal entries and letters, one of the book’s first pages says, “Lord, I especially want to thank you this morning for my mother. How blessed I am to have had you choose such a woman to bear me!”
What maturity in recognizing as we advance in life’s journey, and perhaps even become mothers and fathers, how hard we ourselves may have been to parent!
Wounded mothers
However, what about those of us who have difficult mother relationships or have even been abandoned by mothers. Broken-ness, past hurt and unresolved pain, some from their own childhoods, will all contribute to difficult adult mother-child relationships.
Codependence, where a mother is looking to her children to meet her needs, and unhealthy rigid family systems can be carried on from generation to generation. Without intervention and healing these negative family parent relationships will continue often without awareness.
Other mothers
Spiritual mums can be huge blessing and make up for some lack. These mother figures can become real gems as they positively input into lives filling empty areas with love, affirmation, encouragement and understanding. These are the ones who pray with you and walk with you through life’s problems. You will know the woman when you met her.
My own mother relished the role of motherhood. She doted in providing for her family’s needs with nourishing meals, warm clothes, a cozy home, after school activities and much more. She had a strong faith for which I am eternally grateful and gave us all a firm foundation for adulthood.
God’s Word
The Bible consistently tells us to honour and love our mothers and fathers. In fact, it is one of the ten commandments and the only way with a promise attached. “Honour your father and your mother, so that you may live long in the land the Lord your God is giving you.” (Exodus chapter 20, verse 12)
Finally, here is a thought. Given all the benefits mother can, do or strive to provide perhaps May should be the MONTH of mothers?
Sarah Richards has a Post-graduate Dip in journalism and has written for a number of secular and Christian newspapers, magazines and websites in New Zealand including Challenge Weekly, Christian Life, Bible Society New Zealand and the Daily Encourager. She is also a trained counsellor.
Sarah loves family and has two young adult children and a Minnie poodle. In her spare time she runs, walks, writes, attends church and visits cafes!