I recall when I turned 30. It stated $481 Jamaican dollars. That was the amount of money the ABM (ATM) receipt indicated I had left in my account. In US dollars that is $4.81. I chuckled at the number. I had so many desires in my heart and my pocket could not even begin to take care of them.
I desired, I hoped, I wished. Nothing happened… but I hadn’t reached 30 days.
Since 2015 was a special year I made big plans. It was going to be different… incredible… amazing... but nothing I planned would stick. It cost too much, there was not enough time, my friends couldn’t come....
I was saving to buy something special for my birthday but was making little progress. So, I resigned myself to do without it and have an ordinary birthday. But I hadn’t factored in God.
The very weekend I told my family that I had given up on my plans for my birthday, the gifts started pouring in. Unbeknown to me, my family and friends had planned 30 days of gifts and surprises. As I said, it was memorable.
In the coming days I went through a whirlwind of laughter, tears, shock and excitement as my friends and family poured out their love to me in different ways. I started getting the very things my heart desired and with every gift, every note, every outing I felt God reminding me I see you and I know your desires.
My Heavenly Father was just wowing me. I mattered. I was on His To-Do List. My pair of shoes which I so badly wanted was not at the bottom of list of prayers to answer, you know, way down below world peace but was right up there with everything else.
Even when I was forgetful He was faithful. That US$4.81 was the balance left in my account after withdrawing my tithe that I had forgotten to give. I decided to give it anyway and scarcely was the tithe paid than THE gift arrived. The wedding I had so wanted to attend but couldn’t afford was now a reality- a plane ticket. I had US$4.81 in the bank and a US$300 plane ticket in my hand.
Every gift, every card, every experience was God assuring me that He sees me, He loves me, I matter to Him. When I was resigning myself to doing without, I didn’t know that God was already at work, and plans were already in place to give me the desires of my heart.
God was saying “I got this!” now I ask-
“Why would you ever complain?” Or whine saying, "God has lost track of me. He doesn't care what happens to me."
I like the way The Message Bible bring this home to me. It's so applicable. Don't you know anything? Haven't you been listening? God doesn't come and go. God lasts. He's Creator of all you can see or imagine.
He doesn't get tired out, doesn't pause to catch his breath. And he knows everything, inside and out. He energizes those who get tired, gives fresh strength to dropouts.
For even young people tire and drop out, young folk in their prime stumble and fall. But those who wait upon GOD get fresh strength. They spread their wings and soar like eagles, they run and don't get tired, they walk and don't lag behind (Isaiah chapter 40 verses 27-31 Message Bible).
My belief in God’s love and His greatness of course is not dependent on what He provides, and neither should yours. Instead, let this be a reminder and encouragement that when you wait upon the Lord He gives and takes care of your needs.
So, soar. Trust God.
Stacy-Ann Smith is a Press Service International West Indies young writer and the 2017 Internationals Young Writers Theology Award winner.
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